undigniFiend

The house flooded again. Last week, in fact. Haven't had a chance to squawk about it until now due to all the demolition-duty. So now I'm tired, sore, and dreaming of mountains.

I think I'm handling this one a lot better. For one, we saved a lot more than last time. For two, I didn't get left behind by myself before it happened. For three, demolition forces me to focus on something other than being melodramatic. (For a bit, at least. I'm not completely un-self-aware.) My folks are taking this like champions, but I really didn't want them to have to watch the flood in action. Not knowing when it will stop rising is one of the worst parts. Right behind the whole "we can't reach a hospital if anyone is seriously injured" part... Fortunately, no one on our street has been seriously injured during the past two floods, but if this trend continues (and I am certain it will) we're going to have to figure out how to handle that scenario. First Aid training and learning how to pack a damn good medical kit are now on my to-do list, but that's only the start of countering that particular issue.

Moving sounds like a good idea to me, if only to avoid more flooding and the stress that comes with it. But this is basically my family's dream home. Whatever they decide, I'm with them. And if they decide to stay, I'll be there to help clean up after the next one, whenever it hits. Still, that won't stop me dreaming about buying a plot of non-flooding land and designing a new, earthbuilding-style dream home to live more securely in. Maybe I can fart around with the designing part, and keep an eye on the market for empty lots with plenty of good drainage and elevation.

I don't know when I'll be back. Probably around the time we get to the rebuilding phase, which can't really happen until we finish the demolition phase. So I'll be spending my days on that to help it happen as soon as possible.

UPDATE: 8/1/18

Thought I was revving the engine, but it kind of spluttered instead. Shame and dishonor. The past month has been a bit more interesting than I generally like. Family tension aside, I'm not doing so hot, physically. Lemme put it in math terms: 

Scoliosis + Job that demands a lot from my back = A spine that feels about 70 years older than the rest of my body. 

Fortunately, I think it just needs time. I went through something similar last year, and it eventually passed. It just sucks hobbling everywhere, and my spine gets really torqued off whenever I sit down for any length of time and then try to stand up. Like my sacrum is screeching 'To Hell With Thee!' to everything that touches it. And my lumbar spine learned how to do a fairly convincing impression of a precarious stack of rocks grinding each other as they consider giving up and toppling. It's not as bad as last year, and I'll try to keep it from getting there. The lack of being able to sit for very long has made it difficult to write and draw, but I have been writing! New, fluffy J&D chapter on the way, plus I got the itch to draw some stuff from it.

Also - I'm also on FA under the same username, where I might also occasionally post some sensitive material at some point (mostly innocent stuff, though, I think), but I'll be sure to figure out how to tag it appropriately so it won't scar any innocent eyes. For anyone hoping to see furry or anthro art from me on FA, I apologize - monsters are my favorites, and are likely to remain the main subjects of anything I ever do.

Speaking of monsters, I got a new predator species in the works because I have no self control and I'm Hella Excited about them. I'll post biology/culture/etc notes and pictures for them as their design solidifies - they're still in the exploratory stage.

Whenever I dare to sit for any length of time (and between writing bits of the new chapter) I've been trying to get the hang of all the different layouts of all these different places I somehow signed myself up for. Thank you for your patience and support, and I'll post (in various places) when I can!

+++++

ORIGINAL POST: (...dang, early July?)

I'm not leaving dA. Just want to clear that up first. I'll still post stuff here on occasion. My stories don't have a spectacular update rate to begin with, so I'm not sure whether or not I can say they're 'on hold'. I intend to finish Sanctuary (and its sequel, though I'm thinking of making that more of an 'Act II' under the same title) and Jace and Devon's story (and find a better name for it) eventually, but they're on the back-burner for now. Whenever I do update them, they'll be here.

Which implies there's somewhere else they could possibly be, and that's not wrong. I've got a (very lightly) used tumblr account under the same username where I intend to post visual and worldbuilding stuff, and a shiny new AO3 (also under 'undigniFiend') where I intend to post new stories (original, but I might keep dabbling in fanfiction, too).

"But 'Fiend! Why there and not here?"

Good question. I've lately developed an interest in playing with more risque themes, ranging from mild stuff that would be fine here on dA, to more explicit stuff that might not be so dandy. I might be a dirty trash goblin, but I'm a Lawful Good dirty trash goblin. That, and I don't want to end up posting something I feel I held back on, especially if it's a vore scene - that's my Magnum Opus in life, after all: figure out how the heck to express just what the heck I like so much about vore, of all things. Since I'm into the non-lethal, emotionally intimate variety, I figure 'Why not spice it up with some of the physically intimate variety as well?' It's hella fun to write, after all. (And would probably be hella fun to draw.) I just feel uncomfortable with posting said material here, where it might be against site policy.

Thanks, and have an excellent day, my doves.

Okay so I may have tripped and fell into a Transformers obsession. Never really thought much of it before. I mean I knew it existed, I just didn't think it would be something I'd be into. So I've been distracted and have failed to be productive, and I'm going to try and remedy that. Probably won't have anything to show for it in the coming week because I'll be out of state helping family, but I hope to have at least a few things ready to post when I get back. Probably won't have a lot of time to scribble things down, but I'll take what chances I can get.

Recently watched Prime, and then read More Than Meets The Eye, which impressed the hell out of me, and am currently furiously sobbing over events in it's sequel, Lost Light.

I'd love to write fanfiction sometime (after I finish my current projects), but I'm pretty sure said fanfiction would basically end up like this, but not quite as funny:

House Update: The place looks better than it ever did before and it's not even finished yet! We're all still crammed upstairs, but everything's moving along nicely and seeing the place physically recover is gradually uncoiling the knot of tension leftover from the Flood Adventure. I can't look outside without remembering how the street and the house looked during the worst of it, but I'm gradually learning to respond to it with "Yeah, that sucked, but we're in such good shape that I feel rather spoiled," instead of having to shut my eyes, clench my fists, and take deep breaths. I'm also learning to love rain again.

And the weather here is awesome lately. Overcast skies, cool breezes, the flowers that survived (and some new ones we've planted) are strong and gorgeous, and we have FIREFLIES. When we first moved here, we saw maybe a couple at the edge of the woods at most, but last night there were tons of them and we were all beside ourselves - fireflies are only one of my favorite bugs ever. I don't think of myself as a superstitious person, but I can't help thinking of them as good omens. Them, and dragonflies.

Writing Update: Currently editing Sanctuary, mostly Chapter 5 and onward, and Chapter 11 is nearly finished (and yes, there will be detailed vore). Edits will focus on the following:

+Crucial info I left out concerning the avrani (another powerful species that rivals the tzydha in stature, power, and are their literal, ancient rivals). Still not sure how better to reveal it in these circumstances. That's a chronic issue with my writing - I subscribe to the idea that The Best Explanation Is A Demonstration (another way of saying the classic 'Show, Don't Tell'). But actually sticking to that rule? And knowing when to reveal what? Nngh. I still have so much to learn. It doesn't help that there aren't (yet) any avrani around to do any demonstrating.

+My characterization of Sena sucks, so I'm giving her some love.

+Beefing up some of the Grak content to make his character more consistent. (And completely re-writing his little argument with Kalun - that was so corny I'm embarrassed to have ever considered releasing it into the wild).

+Some of the milder Grak/Avi fluff might be in jeopardy because Avi's family aren't oblivious and they Do Not Approve^(TM), but they're still a thing.

Watchers will get updated chapter notifications when they happen.

Also, found some good writing music for the world of Sanctuary:

I've had an issue with nightmares for almost as long as I can remember, and I think it's part of why I'm not much of a morning person. My subconscious leaves me worn out and tense when I'm ideally supposed to have gotten some good rest, and it's hard to loosen up until I consciously take deep breaths and focus on relaxing. The trouble with doing that in bed is that it sometimes sends me right back into the nightmare I just escaped.

My usual nightmares are pretty gruesome, but lately (post hurricane Harvey) my subconscious has swapped gruesomeness for more realism, and it's interfering with my waking life. So I'm falling back on a tactic I used throughout grade school - sleeping with music playing. It doesn't prevent the nightmares, but I think it helps them not last so long. And it's easier to fall asleep when I have some relaxing sensory cue to distract my subconscious so it doesn't try to jumpscare and/or slowly crush me with the worst stuff it can conjure in the moment.

That said, Amethystium was always (and still is) one of my go-to's. And I can't believe I went 4 years without knowing about their latest album. (It's great writing/drawing music, too.)